I remember, you gave me a globe because I wanted the world, never would I have thought that eventually I would be sharing that with the love of my life, with you.
A breath of fresh air. After being suffocated, I felt like when you came along, you saved me. I hated guys but you proved me wrong. You're perfect. Absolutely perfect. I learned so much and I would always find myself feeling like I am the luckiest girl in the world to be with someone like you. Someone who in my eyes was perfect.
You being the best, wanted me to be at my best. I thought that even with the milestones that would come across our way, we always got through regardless. I thought from other couples we were different because we can say whatever the fuck we want and never got mad. We never were big on gifts but we found ourselves always giving. You exceeded my expectations and more. You're the first guy that got me thinkin that maybe 'forever' ain't so bad. Maybe, we can be something great. I love you, I really do.
However, when you think you're at the top, you can't stay there. At one point you gotta go down and we did... Our understanding of another wasn't on point anymore. You made me felt like I didn't understand you and you didn't understand me. It reinforced my mindset of me not being good enough for you. Then when you didn't know whether you wanted to be with me or not. It hurt because even though I know I'm a pain in the ass sometimes, I felt horrible. The fact that I know I love you so much. The fact that I always thought you're one in a million. The fact that I admired you so much. The fact that from the beginning I thought we would never ever come to this, but we did. How I felt like... I don't deserve you... I never did. It was the right that you felt the way you did about me. So I shut down. I pushed you away.
I messed up though. I'm not a good person and when you wanted me back. I didn't know what to do. Why is it that we don't know what we have until it's gone? It was the worst feeling knowing that I hurt you, that we hurt each other. We tried to make amends but I don't know.. I couldn't piece myself back together to move forward since I felt so confused. One day you didn't want anything to do with me, the next day you do. I knew that even though you wanted it to work out, you're still hurt and I can't live with the fact that I made you feel like that to question if we should be together or not. I want you to be happy, but I don't think you can be with me. So I had to slowly let go and face the truth that we've reached our climax.
I don't think I can ever forget how amazingly special you are to me. Thanks for everything though.. Thanks to that guy who I saw was perfect; gifting me of the world and showing me how beautiful it can be.
